This post is inspired by a picture posted by a friend on
Facebook. The picture depicts a former
Miss World and Bollywood Star, Ashwariya Rai Bachan who gained a third chin
with the birth of her first baby. So my topic today is about women who gain
excessive weight after child birth.
Women deserve utmost credit for merely having the God given
ability to bear children. This task in itself is an incredibly selfless act of
love. It is not our intention to undermine the role of mothers and women.
Women should gain up to 15kg during their pregnancy,
anything up to 18kg is still accepted. Some women however start packing on the
kilos; eating huge portions of food, all sorts of junk and unhealthy foods and
cravings that makes men wonder what creature is she feeding. Some weird
cravings like raw potatoes, sand, stones, coca-cola, cakes, fresh cream,
sweets, chips, leaves, none of which are
healthy either. Halfway through these pregnancies women need to go shopping for
clothes as nothing fits them, so instead of going to a store that sells clothes
for a modern pregnant women they buy giant clothing somewhat 5 sizes larger than
their own size.
This for me is absolutely unbelievable as maternity clothes are
sized according to one’s own size with the necessary adjustments made
accordingly viz; if prior to your pregnancy you were a size 8 then your
pregnancy wear would be a size 8. Women rationalize overeating during pregnancy as: it must be good for the
Baby and continue to munch along giving in to every edible whim whilst throwing
their hips to infinity and beyond!
We have all watched women in our family who have had children
and never got back into their youthful clothing. We have watched them
distribute their clothes amongst friends, family members, the domestic workers
and charity. We have also had the pleasure of hearing how after we have a child
we can say goodbye to those clothes, heels and hips! And for these over indulgent
pregnant women no statement can be truer than this…..
After much anticipation, the bundle of joy arrives and the
spotlights focus swiftly changes from mother to Baby. The mother becomes
virtually non-existent until needed for feeding. And the little pregnancy world
that the mom was bathing in for so long disappears. Reality strikes with the
overwhelming need to provide and protect a new soul in your care coupled with
all other responsibilities of your actual life. A daunting task for all women!
A few weeks pass and the hype around your family subsides. Everyone
nestles into a routine and you realise that you are exactly the same person you
were before the baby arrived. You did not die to self, neither were you brainwashed of everything remotely stylish and fashionable. For those who were
realistic about their pregnancy getting back into their routine, life, business
and sense of style returns with less effort, almost as normal as the sun
rising.
However for the rest, things get a bit trickier. Months
pass, they have developed a new eating plan and a flare for food. These women's weight remains unchanged from the
days of the pregnancy. They settle comfortably into their maternity wear which becomes their normal clothes size. Prancing around in track pants and
slops the “new moms new uniform”! With their new formed figure and style to
match, their conversations have transformed into complaints about the huge task of motherhood, not
enough time in a day, weight problems, negativity, low self esteem, depression
(usually in denial of this) and little to no sex drive.
A year passes and we see a new human being, one who is so
comfortable in her oversized life and comfortably sinks into the rationale that
it is acceptable to be gain weight because you had a
baby.
Two points of note here;
1. If you and your partner are happy with the new rounded
you, that’s great, you have a winning combination and there is nothing wrong
with having a bit of weight on you. The main thing is, if you are comfortable and
confident in your skin the rest of the world sees it. But
2. If you are not happy with this new you whereby weight gain is an
issue then you have serious issues. First and
foremost you believe that you have gained weight because you had a baby and you
expect everyone else to believe the same. Think logically ladies, if it takes 10 months for a woman’s body to create a human, then it
should take about the same time to get back to pre-pregnancy state. The process
can be quicker if you choose it to be.
Complaining and enviously looking at other thin women and
moms will not solve your problem, in fact it will make you feel worse. You find
your partners eyes goes a touring when you visit a mall. You hear guys jokes about
how women change after the baby. Your sex life takes a plunge and you are with
a partner who is constantly frustrated listening about how you wish you were
thin blah blah blah….And that’s exactly how you sound to him. Over prolonged periods this situation has the potential to develop into more serious issues of no confidence,
depression, lack of sex appeal and sex drive, infidelity and even divorce.
To discuss celebrities and how they gain weight is not even
an issue I wish to discuss because in this age they have a baby today and
7days later they have perfectly sculptored abs! So it is beyond my wildest
imagination why a former Miss World will place herself in a position of extreme
criticism. We can understand 5kg over weight but 2 and 3 extra chins while
looking like a mother hippo is not accepted from celebrities in society today!
SOME BACKGROUND information, over the past 3 years I have seen and experienced at
least 6 women who gave birth. Those that had a natural birth almost
immediately fitted into a wardrobe of clothes that were just one size bigger
than their pre-pregnancy size. Within 3months they were back into their normal sized clothes.
The C-Section moms took longer and these women never really got into their
pre-pregnancy clothes again however they are not more than a single size bigger
than the pre-pregnancy size they once were. I do not have a single friend that
has used the child birth excuse for being overweight. I hear every other reason
but never child birth.
And finally, I speak for myself, so you know, that I know, what I am writing about; I have a 2year old Gem. I gained 15kg during my pregnancy,
lost 8 kg one week after the birth, lost 3 further kilos in the first 3months
and was at my pre-pregnancy weight of 45kg when my Baby turned 10 months. All this was achieved very simply by eating
normal, healthy foods during and after the pregnancy. It is not rocket science neither has it got anything to do with money. It is really about common sense, being
healthy and not over indulging during the pregnancy.
So the next time you hear a woman use child birth as a
reason for weight gain, ask her to try again with a more believable reason. Or
just walk away instead of swimming in that sea of delusion.
